I work for Adware Companies

...that's right, I really do. You know how I've come to this conclusion?

By spending hours and hours of my life doing them a favour, that's why. I am an employee of Adware makers in everything but name, uniform and national insurance number. Every day, I spend countless hours clearing out networks of unauthorised installs, replying to emails complaining of nasty infections and giving phone interviews on what the future holds for these programs.

Is it just me, or does make me sound less like a security researcher and more like an adware firm's tech support, customer relations and PR Guru?

Why is it that, despite the fact I am basically a guy sitting in front of a PC, in the stolen moments I get, I am able to:

* Track, find and reveal a shedload of dubious / unauthorised installs, for companies that seemingly cannot work out where their affiliates take their produce despite having some of the biggest, fattest wallets around?

* Spend hours every day discussing messed up PCs and acting as second line tech support for people who really should have access to some sort of 0800 number for the guys who put the software there in the first place?

* Listen to companies plead innocence because (ho hum), "The affiliate did it" and then seemingly absolve themselves of all blame?

In short, why aren't these guys paying me a steaming great big pile of money? Why am I working for them for free? Why do they wait for us to go "Holy Shit Indy! Look at this this one over here", write about it, they say "Thanks very much", remove the rogue affiliate then thank said person / company / whoever with a Cease and Desist letter?

Why is this still happening at all?

Is it really so difficult to police internal networks? If so, perhaps (incredible idea, this) you shouldn't rent your software out to chumps whose only goal is to absolutely slaughter a PC with a mega-whack install of money making badness? When the same people who have (for years) washed their hands of all responsibility for afiliates going screwy, it's just a big old plate of same old, same old. For example, it's all very well and good sending me one of these - it really, really is - but what happens to all the poor fools who got nailed with that particular install?

Will they be compensated? Will they recieve free help to remove whatever ended up on their system without their consent? Or will they just be left in the lurch, whilst the unauthorised software installed without permission is given the green light to make money that shouldn't really be put in the bank in the first place?

Let me guess - another "unfortunate" victim of Affiliate-itus. Someone will sort them out, right? Like the unpaid tech-support over here, perhaps? And where the Hell is my tea break?

At the Antispyware Conference in San Francisco a while back, Esther Dyson said:

Esther: "How many of you were shocked by the installs we saw?"

"You're still living off your install base from a long time ago, so even if you clean up, you're still profiting from your more 'dubious' installs. So how about this?

Use your popup ads to educate, inform and engage in a public awareness / education campaign to say, 'You have our stuff onboard, this is what it does, these are the benefits, this is how you remove it. Please opt in to keep it onboard. How about it?"

At the time, she was met with mumbled "Maybes" and the rather laughable suggestion that "Well, the Antispyware guys need to do their part too! Stop picking on us!"

Well look, it's months down the line, nothing's happened and people are still out there who are living with rogue installs. Why hasn't this been followed up? Why has nobody even attempted to have a go at doing this? It solves some of your biggest problems. It cleans out a raft of all those unauthorised installs that you claim never happens, even though we all know they're going on all the time. All those angry people who hate you, suddenly love you because you told them how to remove an unexpected install. People like me love you, because I'm not running around having to police your own networks for you. Everyone stops wailing on you and you gain some street cred.

If something like this is not seriously attempted soon, when the next wacky install comes around and everyone is screaming for blood left, right and centre, the press is full of journalists screaming "Outrage!" and everyone seemingly has it in for you, there won't be any point complaining because all we will say in response is


Image used with permission from Maddox