Postbag answers, seances and all kinds of crazy stuff

It's that time of the week again - switch off your brain and prepare for some real dope answers on things and stuff, yo. Let's get this train wreck moving...

Loads of people recommend browsers such as firefox, opera, etc over internet explorer due to the fact that IE is as a sieve in the pissing downpour that is drive-by malware installs. My question is, with an apparent increase in IM-client-vectored installs, will we need to start recommending secure IM clients? If yes, how do the variouse IM clients like MSN messenger, AOL messenger, trillian, gaim etc compair as far as security is concerned? (Dak)

Secure IM clients are well overdue - the scary thing is, as all the infections come from clickable URLs, you're pretty much doomed whatever client you use by default. Yes, all the IM clients have security teams that run around blocking URLs or whatever, but considering those teams probably consist of one guy called Kevin and his pet gerbil, the thought doesn't exactly fill me with confidence. For now, you're better off employing a third-party security tool thingy for workplaces and good old common sense at home. Combine this with a browser like Firefox and you're almost home and dry. I mean, you still have to run the damn EXE even if you manage to get it on board in the first place. Of course, there's a wide range of security tools you can use at home too but my Google is currently borked so I can't find any. Doh. Then again, I'm totally security tool free where IM is concerned, because all of my IM chats go like this:

PG: Was that link from you?
Bob: Yeah.
PG: Really, really?
Bob: Yeah...
PG: No, I mean - is this really you and not some stupid virus? If I get nailed, I'll beat you up.
Bob: Say hello to the blocklist, dummy.
PG: Look, you need to prove it's you....hello? Hello? Bob? Your connection seems to have died...hello?

In conclusion, don't talk to me on IM. I'll only annoy you.

Time to channel Nostrodamus. We know about the threats posed by IM, trojans, viruses, blended threats, etc etc. What's next that we don't know about yet? What do you know about Windows (in)security that you haven't told us for fear it wreck our fragile little minds?
(Derrill)

Well I channelled him, and Elvis says hi. He also told me that they call McDonalds cheeseburgers McTimbers, though this was a long time ago on a school trip and they probably changed that now. As for wrecking your fragile little minds, mine was pretty trashed when I saw this thing. Stop and think about it for a moment - actually making an application that throws you to jailbait websites with one click of a button? Forget Windows holes, browser flaws and IM shenanigans - nothing will make people jump offline and never return quicker than a kiddy-pr0n browser. Or a fiddle-diddle IM client. How about a Loli-Media center, now with extra helpings of illegal?

I mean, the possibilities just boggle the mind, and I'm being deadly serious. I never, ever, in a million bajillion years thought that someone would sit down and go, okay yeah, this is awesome - illegal pr0n browser!! I like to try and predict the future by sitting down and thinking of the worst possible thing someone could do. Then throw more at it. Till I end up with a rootkit that eats your dog, kills your family and spams the entire internet with Viagra ads and sets your house on fire.

But making you jump ship with nothing but the awesome power of total and utter FEAR that the next click you make will send you straight to the slammer with Big Bubba as your cellmate?

Like...wow. That's right through the "awesome" envelope and straight into the "OMFGBBQBBQ!!" waste paper basket.

ok if we are going to bring Nostrodamus into this how about PG tells us how many security Updates does he think Vista will need in the first 3 years :-P
(Milligan's Ghost)

Too late, he's gone now and all I have left is some old woman from Kent who keeps telling me to "look behind the vase in the sitting room".

Do you think the public's really that aware of the threat rootkits pose to them? (Kimson)

No, no and no. It's just one more to add to the big pile of OH GOD LOOK WHAT THEY DO NOW, followed (three weeks later) by, "Oh well, rootkits suck. What's for dinner". Meanwhile, the stuff that initially caused the panic has been surpassed by more devious techniques that will go back and stomp all over little Jimmy and his PC. Then again, should the public at large have to go around worrying about all this stuff all the time? Maybe it's just the security people's responsibility to do that. As long as they have some kind of awareness of the problem, that'll do me. And I just found an Aaliyah track on my PC, I can't believe how awesome it is. WE SALUTE YOU, AALIYAH AND LEFT EYE AND BIGGIE AND TUPAC, EVEN THOUGH YOU WON'T STOP RELEASING THIRD RATE ALBUMS SIX HUNDRED YEARS AFTER YOU DIED FOR GOD'S SAKE.

I stupid installed a toolbar called clickcrawler toolbar on my PC. Ive searched it on Google and can't find any forums or disscussions weither its bad for my computer or not. Is the toolbar spyware/adware?(clickcrawler.com). (Joeyjoejoe)

Oh wow, are you related to Joey Jo-Jo Jr. Shabadoo? I love that guy. Anyway, it looks like no-one actually flags it as a pest that I could see - just looks like your common or garden variety toolbar. If you're unsure of it, I'd just uninstall it and stick to the "known" toolbars.

Should we all just buy a Macintosh? Now that you can run both XP and OSX you can be safe and insecure on the same machine. (Mike)

As I don't use Macs, I don't feel like I have any authority to answer this one, though I do like the almost Zen-like approach of making your box less secure by sticking Windows on it. Ah, to Hell with it - yeah, everyone go out and buy a Mac. But then you have to send me your old PC, cause' you won't be needing it. I'll gather them all up and donate them to orphans or something.

That concludes another session of questions, answers and communicating with the spirits of old women in Kent. I think her name is Ethel.